Dear Full Sail Real World Education...
Look, I don't complain much (and when I do, it's over something small like hitting my funny bone, getting the hiccups, chafing, etc.). Anyway, this letter is not so much a complaint as it is a request. I just need you to understand how I feel so that maybe there can be some kind of agreement between us.
We're friends and nothing will change that, but it seems that lately you've been kind of (oh, how can I put this delicately?) a freaking nuisance. There is only so much a guy can take of one person before he gets annoyed, and this relationship has been extremely one-sided. All I am asking is for you to lay off a little; let me spend some time with my wife, you know? It has gotten to that awkward point where looking at you feels funny, a little gay even. I would feel a lot better knowing that you had other friends out there. It's not that I have anything against homosexuality, but I'm married. You know that. There is no way I would ever see you as something more than just a friend.
It's really hard for me to be writing this. I mean, we started off so well together. I was amazed at how much we had in common; you were like a brother to me! And you have been really nice, believe me. You are always teaching me new things, and letting me play with all your gear. You have been more than generous. But the past month or so you have gotten a little out of hand. You want to hang out every day for 8 hours or more, even on Sundays when I usually go to church. And I feel obligated as a good person and friend to come over when you ask me to.
So, you can still invite me over and I will still show up at your doorstep. But try to limit our time together, okay? I don't want to get burned out after only 5 months of knowing you. Because the truth is, I like you. Honestly. But freaking A, dude! We got 7 more months to hang out.
I'm just telling you striaght up, I am going back to my home town to see my family for Christmas. Do yourself a favor and do the same. While you're there (and I mean this in the most sincere way), take a shower. You've really started to let yourself go and everyone is starting to talk about the smell.
Please don't get upset. Like I said before, I just wanted to request a little time away from you awhile, that's all. It's because I like you so much, really. Take care man, and Merry Christmas.
Your friend,
Jeff
We're friends and nothing will change that, but it seems that lately you've been kind of (oh, how can I put this delicately?) a freaking nuisance. There is only so much a guy can take of one person before he gets annoyed, and this relationship has been extremely one-sided. All I am asking is for you to lay off a little; let me spend some time with my wife, you know? It has gotten to that awkward point where looking at you feels funny, a little gay even. I would feel a lot better knowing that you had other friends out there. It's not that I have anything against homosexuality, but I'm married. You know that. There is no way I would ever see you as something more than just a friend.
It's really hard for me to be writing this. I mean, we started off so well together. I was amazed at how much we had in common; you were like a brother to me! And you have been really nice, believe me. You are always teaching me new things, and letting me play with all your gear. You have been more than generous. But the past month or so you have gotten a little out of hand. You want to hang out every day for 8 hours or more, even on Sundays when I usually go to church. And I feel obligated as a good person and friend to come over when you ask me to.
So, you can still invite me over and I will still show up at your doorstep. But try to limit our time together, okay? I don't want to get burned out after only 5 months of knowing you. Because the truth is, I like you. Honestly. But freaking A, dude! We got 7 more months to hang out.
I'm just telling you striaght up, I am going back to my home town to see my family for Christmas. Do yourself a favor and do the same. While you're there (and I mean this in the most sincere way), take a shower. You've really started to let yourself go and everyone is starting to talk about the smell.
Please don't get upset. Like I said before, I just wanted to request a little time away from you awhile, that's all. It's because I like you so much, really. Take care man, and Merry Christmas.
Your friend,
Jeff
posted by Jeff at 10:57 AM
3 Comments:
first of all let me say that chafing is no small thing. that stuff can get seriously irritating and painful. especially if you're in a situation where you have no choice but to walk a lot, like this time that i was at a conference in vegas for about a week, and i was burning by the end of the first day. there's just nothing you can do about that. sure, everyone's got their own little home remedy, but frankly, to an overly perspirating guy like myself, they do nothing but make me walk even funnier. jeff, you've brought up a touchy topic, and, frankly i'm offended by the way you spoke of it so lightly.
now, on with your post. i'm sorry about your hurting relationship. from experience, i can certainly say i remember the time when looking at you gave me that funny gay feeling, but the way you embraced me at that moment made all the world's troubles melt away. i think you've chosen the right path, jeff. this first step was the hardest, except of course for the steps that will follow. those tall, hard, never ending steps, required to win the champeenship. but you've got to fight. you've got to wake up before dawn and eat your half dozen raw eggs. you've got to spread out your numberous bathroom breaks. you've got to wiiiiin in the eeend. you've got to win the eend.
um, i think i had more, but then my mom called, and now i've lost my train of thought. so happy holidays and be sure to back up your files.
jeff that's crazy...that sounds like this one girl at my school. i think you met her last year. i think she called you "mega man dude" ? windy knows who i'm talking about
grr why do i always forget...
<3 Katy
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